Photos By: Karen Curley

I’ve been feeling a little ornery this week; I’ve been doing Yoga, listening to old Snot records, hanging out with cougars, and well, the testosterone’s been up 10-15 notches, so it was no surprise when a few good friends of mine got caught in the cross-hairs of my journey of self-discovery and ‘how far can I push the envelope this month?’ attitude. I must pre-warn you, some of the events and conversations below may be slightly exaggerated, or made up, I’ll let you, the reader decide.

The sun was shining on a beautiful, picturesque Tuesday morning; I sprang out of bed singing the theme to “American Dad” – I also felt spring fever coming on a little early – not to mention February is “Love Month” on CWG, and I felt like rolling with the editorial concept full-force. A friend of mine (who shall remain anonymous) called me, and I felt like foregoing seriousness for a series of misunderstood jokes, smart-assed comments, and just plain silliness; I figured this type of uncalled for behavior would brighten her day.

Here’s how that went…

Anonymous Friend: One of our artists is playing the Roxy tonight, do you want me to put you on the list?

Jim: Yeah, Wale right? He must be quite big. (Editor’s note: God… Did I really think that joke was funny? Unfortunately, yes… Also, I’m thinking that this artist’s name is pronounced ‘Whale’ – This will come into play later.)

Anonymous Friend: (Not quite grasping the joke) Yeah! He’s worked with Lady Gaga. (Obviously she’s still thinking that this is a serious conversation).

Jim: Cool. So… He’s one of those “European artists,” like Sigur Rios? (Me being somewhat serious.)

Anonymous Friend: Um… No… He’s American.

Jim: So… I should tell my photographer to get a lens that’s big enough. (Ouch! This joke was bad.)

Anonymous Friend: Yes… Great! I’ll see if I can get you a photo pass.

She texted me 15 minutes later.

“I got you on the list with photo pass!”

I then texted Karen Curley, one of our best photographers.

Jim’s text: Hey kid, wanna cover Wale @ The Roxy with me?

Karen’s text: Kid? I’m old enough to be your mother!

Jim’s text: No way! You’re the hottest photographer in Los Angeles!

Now, our Urban/Pop Editor, who’s also our VP of Human Resources, has warned me about these types of exchanges and double entendrés with staff and colleagues, but as I said, this is “Love Month,” and I’m rolling with it full-force.

Karen’s text: Lol! You better put your money where your mouth is, and put that in print!

You’re welcome, Karen!!!!! On to the show review…

Karen and I strolled up to the ticket window at the Roxy. I leaned in with a certain gene Se Qua and confidence rivaling any Neil Strauss wannabe, and said, “Hey, how you doin’? We’re here to see Whale.”

My over-the-top grandeur was met with a sneer, “Actually,” the girl said, “It’s Walé, not Whale.”

“Well, goddammit! Why didn’t someone tell me, or at least have the courtesy to put a attaché over the guy’s name?” I thought to myself, as my ego rode off into the sunset like a cowboy in one of those old Westerns.

The girl gave me a dirty look, and proceeded to check the list.

“You’re not on the list,” she retorted.

I figured it was time to admit defeat. Assuming that this night was just not my night, I began to back away from the ticket window.

“He’s Elijah Wood,” Karen told the girl.

She said it so unbelievably dead-pan that I even believed her for a second. The chick let out one of those high-pitched wails that girls do when they’re overly excited about something, and began to jump up in down like a drunken midget wrestler with emo hair; arms flailing and all that shit.

“Oh my God!” she exclaimed, “I’ve seen Lord of the Rings, like, 300 times!!!!”

“Yes,” I replied, “I can tell by your lip piercing.”

She blushed.

“Can I take a picture of you for my iPhone?”

“Sure.”

She snapped a quick picture, which I felt to be inherently ridiculous, as I’m obviously not Elijah Wood, and then gave us two tickets. I felt dirty, but accepted the tickets and photo pass gracefully.

I was finally ready to see this ‘Walé’ guy. I was expecting an electronica show (as all I knew about Walé is that he’s worked with Lady Gaga), and was thrilled at the realization that Walé is a hip-hop artist. I came to this realization as the opening act, a female rapper from H-town, took the stage and halfway rocked it.

Dame Fifty5, a politically-charged Rap Metal outfit played next. I went nuts! Lil’ Wayne brought Rap Rock back with 2009’s “Prom Queen,” and the genre seems to be making a steady comeback. During the bridge of the first song, Dame’s guitar player threw his guitar around his shoulder like a windmill and ripped into the heaviest chorus I’ve ever heard at a rap show. The last time I tried to spin a guitar over my shoulder, I ended up looking like an abused wife. Kudos, Dame Fifty5!

Up next was Boston/L.A.-based Audible Mainframe. The MC looked like a lighter-skinned, yet more intellectual ?uestlove, and spat his rhymes out with the ferocity of Zack De La Rocha. I spent the duration of their 45-minute set in awe, as A.M. pummeled me with rhymes, rock and what can only be dubbed ‘hot lyrics.’

Karen (the photographer credited above), and I had been deep in conversation about God Lives Underwater, when Audible Mainframe began to play. In a fit of artistic passion, or insanity, Karen threw a full cup of Redbull and Vodka on me, as she scrambled to rattle off a few shots; I stood there, drenched from my jacket to my now vodka-soaked boxer shorts with little red hearts (remember, “Love Month.”)
I felt like a wet poodle and reeked like booze for the rest of the night.

By 12 AM, I was excited to see the headliner. I figured that this Walé guy must be a big deal, as hip-hoppers as far as the eye could see had lined the street for this almost-sold out show at the world-famous Roxy. By the time the last opener had finished, the Roxy was packed wall-to-wall with hyped-up hip-hoppers (myself included).

Walé finally came out on stage after his hype-man and DJ prepped the crowd a bit. For those of you who are unfamiliar with this artist, he’s one of the best MCs I’ve seen in the last few years. If you threw Lupe Fiasco and Will.I.Am into a mash-up, you’d have Walé, a ‘backpack’ rapper with flows for miles. He had 20-30 people on stage with him, as this is what happens at any authentic rap show, and didn’t let his energy/vocal attack wane at any point throughout his set. Hip-hop is about community, which is what Walé made everyone at the Roxy feel a part of. I have a feeling this artist will go far… Just don’t call him ‘Whale.’

Note to my Anonymous Friend – Thank you for being such a great sport!